This Sasquatches Fleas are Vietnamese

So Destination Truth is back on for the summer season,  so that means I don’t even have to scour the internet for new beasts. Last week, Josh Gates and team traveled to Vietnam in search of that regions Bigfoot legend and came back with a pretty impressive footprint.

 

Said beast is rumored to live in the mostly unexplored Ke Bang National Park, which is one hell of a thick jungle near the Laos border riddled with giant caves, snakes, tigers and other fun stuff.  He fits somewhere in you standard Squatch description, large (nearly seven feet) excessively hairy except for his knees, soles of his feet and face,  generally colored gray to black. What makes him somewhat unique is that he is alleged to be quite aggressive, charging, hooting , hollering, screaming and famed for chasing would be explorers from their habitat. Over the years there have been many theories from a long  lost surviving neanderthal tribe, to your standard magical forest spirit. I’ll let you make that call.

 

And one last thing before you begin, (just because I know I’m asking for it with this one)… just pause for a second and ponder if your idea is actually horribly racist or merely Airplane level racist. I’m not gonna stop you but know if it’s the first, you might be a horrible person. Ok kids… ready… set…draw!

 

 

Our Judge this week is The Rev Axl Future, writer, wrestler and my role model in the art of knowing nearly useless, but entertaining things… He’s in Philly now but I still want him to open a sandwich shop, so worst case, i can hear about how good it is!… I’ll post judgement as soon as I get it.
 

 

Pop culture mash-up from a great poster that brings a touch of intellectuality, this one is the winner in my book. Nice brushwork and use of color; you can almost smell the sweat, gunpowder and kim chee. De Niro cryptid gambles with his hairy life. Di di mau, ujit. Submitted by BigBlack

 

Well someone's gonna need to buy a new marker soon! Or should I say DidiMao... Nice! Vivid, dark, and a nice lil' nugget of negative space even! Plus it reminds me of one of my favs from Dragon V Dwarf You can see here

 

 

Just like high school calculus, people: show your work! I really dig the notebook paper motif. In my fantasy this really was completed in class, hidden by a budding arteest’s Trapper Keeper, at the expense of his note taking. Eschewing body outlines for the unadorned fur texture is a bold choice, as is the lack of word balloons, thus making the sounds into an environmental effect, bringing the viewer in. No direct Viet Nam references, but the foreign facial features of this one make sure you won’t be confusing him for a domestic skunk ape or local sasquatch. Solid #2. Submitted by EJ

 

Yes what with all the whoots and such I'm pretty sure this one qualifies as a hootenanny! is that even how that's spelled? Another thanks for the usage of the traditional Bigfoot jean shorts and I'm a huge fan of the all vertical fur!

 

 

I would contemplate calling skullduggery that an ICP themed monster illustration gets selected for my judging, knowing of the host’s great desire to be part of that tribe, but perhaps it’s merely the capriciousness of The Norns. However, the details in this fine pic earn it my third place slot: the nipplepocket, a Ke Bang reference (I insist on Vietnamese references in my Batutut drawings), the TP, bald knees, et al. Some Juggalo did his research! Submitted by ScottyJ

 

Well juggalos do pride themselves on welcoming the freaks and outsiders, I'd say a Batutut would fit in just fine. And I'm not entirely sure but I think he has a pocket on the breast of his fur which makes me pretty damn happy!

 

 

 

I love when adherence to my own description puzzles me... I was all, "what's with the adorable cat..." then i remembered the tigers... I freaking love the snake and our lil' Batutut looks damn near serene... or are those racist eyes?

 

 

 

While technically not Vietnamese by birth, John Batututrambo, has spent the better part of his life in the borderlands... It makes me think over the hair headbands should be popular again, but then every time i see someone wearing one i get sad...

 

 

 

Pssst! I think she's in the cave... I'm especially fond of the idea that someone decided to camp right in the mouth of what I assume is Batutut canyon. And good usage of the standard Bigfoot uniform of cutoffs and flip flops!

 

 

 

Ha! The ol' Breakfast at Tiffanies Jerry Lewis teeth routine! I'll always be a sucker for a good silhouette. Add a little bit of boldly typed propaganda and we'd have ourselves a poster! And bent knees or not those are some fun looong arms!

 

 

 

Really the only caption this needs is "Yeeeaaaaarrrrgg!" But how cool would it be if the next wave of popular tattoos was floating ghost Batutut heads... or is that just the head of a penis? hmmmm...

 

 

 

Man, even the beasts have olympic fever... I know the judge is saying ten but I'm calling a slight hyperextension in that weight bearing leg... and two questions? ghost orangutan? and is that a horn in the snakes maw or a well placed dart?

 

 

 

Well I have a new favorite, what with his snowman face unformed fingers and his bald knobby knees! Plus it's even got some Airplane humor... My only concern is the Pin Oak isn't native to Vietnam... ; )

 

 

 

If apes had cheap Halloween costumes, like the kinds you buy in boxes, I bet this is what a person costume would look like. I'm relatively confident I've seen this guy recently and he's totally not that fat, though I enjoy the foliage.

 

 

 

Oh my lord I just wanna tackle this guy! He's adorable, somewhere between a special needs bear and the monster from the original Troll... And I'm entertained with the choice of tiny hair free nipples!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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