The Gnome

Everyone’s Favorite Bearded Backyard Buddy!

Gnomes are grotesque little humanoid creatures that dwell in caves, nooks, hollows and other such dark dank forest places. Generally only a foot to a foot and a half tall, they look like an old hunchbacked human squashed down by an immense gravity (think Phantasm homeworld). Their bellies are rotund and their features, rounded and bulbous. Almost every description i can find includes a pointed cap of some sort and clothing of green or brown to allow them to blend into their environment. There are both male and female gnomes, while the males tend to appear somewhat santa-ish what with the white beards and continual pipe smoking, the females are often described as macabre, witchlike and somewhat unpleasant to gaze upon.

As is often the case with underground dwelling beasts, legend has Gnomes lording over the earths elemental treasures of mineral veins and gemstones and they are considered by some to be the worlds finest crafters of jewelry. Their disposition is to be decided, as some call them friendly and helpful, others have labelled them malicious and tricky.

While modern culture has embraced the gnome as guardian of the garden and travel websites, I’m pretty sure you kids can dig a little deeper and come up with some valid uses for those conical caps and creepy gnarled limbs.

judgement Is Complete

our judgeOur judge this week is going to be Chad Soderholm, the founder and Chief Creative Officer of Digital Aisle, an interactive shopper marketing company based in Chicago, IL (and full transparency my current employer). Chad has been in the marketing industry as a producer/director of various media types for over 15 years. He enjoys long walks in the park, puppies and fish noodling. In this round of submissions, he has specifically stated he is looking for a gnome with an interesting twist or fetish. The more creative and out there, the better!

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