Like the Famed Mammoth, but Chickeny!
So The Travels of Sir John Mandeville is to Europe of the 1400s sort of like the Guinness Book was to 1960s America… everyone had one (well the few “everyones” who read) And like the Guinness book, it offered a window to the strange somewhat obscene and absurd world that existed beyond the horizon. It told tale of an adventurer’s travels from the south of France through the holy lands and into asia and all the oddities held therein.
Now modern day researchers have picked apart dates and places, claiming things don’t fit the accepted timelines and perhaps this guy just made the whole adventure up. And sure if you want to take the side of truth and justice, there are probably a few good points in that argument. But, then you’re stuck in a world where sheep dont grow on vines, where humans can’t survive without heads or with dog heads… and most importantly to us… There would be zero proof of the existence of wooly hens. The bulk of which I present for you here:
from Chapter XXII, entitled
How Men Know by the Idol, If the Sick Shall Die or Not. Of Folk of Diverse Shape and Marvellously Disfigured. And of the Monks that Gave Their Relief to Baboons, Apes, and Marmosets, and to Other Beasts
while I still wonder wtf giving relief to a marmoset means… here is the most important line in that chapter:
“In that country be white hens without feathers,
but they bear white wool as sheep do here.”
Now beyond that, we don’t know how big they are, we don’t know how itchy their wool is nor even if they make delicious gyros. We just know they are white, wooly, chickens and from a place called Latorin.
So get to it! All I ask is you don’t try too hard and have fun with it! We’ll close off submissions for judgement midnight of Friday the 24th… As always, We’ll gather the judges council and pick one to win a shirt, so get your asses doodling!
The Judges have convened and decision rendered! Here’s how it all played out:
Judge Ken was first in with our lil Runner up from Curtis B, to quote him “I pick #4. Cute, yet aggro. There’s no telling what this volatile hen will do!” Then Judge Sneurat came in with “#6 This entry perfectly execute the classic SSSW characteristics that make up all great works or art: Structure, Scenery, Scale and Wattles.” Judge Mona followed quickly behind with “I’m with Sarah on this one. I choose #6 too. Mostly, it’s got just the right amount of adorable chicken mixed with woolly mammoth. Extra points for having its own animated tribal wall art nemesi”
Now it gets exciting cause Ken exclaims “how can you guys pick 6! those tusks are terrifying!!” To which Judge Cody chimes in with: “I choose 6, mainly because the tusks scare my good friend Ken so much”.
Since we’ve got a clean 3 vote win, and it’s going to a new guy, I’m just staying out of it! Congrats to our winner, I’ll be in touch about your prize.
Disagree if you must but know that judgement is law and to the winner a shirt will go…. Thanks to drawers and judges alike. And even though the contest is done we’ll always welcome new Wooly Hen drawings for the archives! So get to it and remember, 25 beasts drawn earns you a shirt!
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