Strange Women Lying in Ponds Distributing Swords is no Basis for a System of Government

So I went to go see one of those watch and talks with John Cleese last weekend where we saw the Holy Grail again… Now I know we’ve done like 3 beasts from the British isles in like two months… but the conversation between Arthur, the mud stacking peasant, “Dennis” and what i believe is credited simply as “Woman”, struck me as comically timely.

For those of you unfamiliar, here’s the relevant part:
ARTHUR: I am your king!
WOMAN: Well, I didn’t vote for you.
ARTHUR: You don’t vote for kings.
WOMAN: Well, ‘ow did you become king then?
ARTHUR: The Lady of the Lake,
[angels sing]
her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water signifying by Divine Providence that I, Arthur was to carry Excalibur.
[singing stops]
That is why I am your king!
DENNIS: Listen — strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
ARTHUR: Be quiet!
DENNIS: Well you can’t expect to wield supreme executive power just ’cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!
ARTHUR: Shut up!
DENNIS: I mean, if I went around sayin’ I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they’d put me away!
ARTHUR: Shut up! Will you shut up!
DENNIS: Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.
ARTHUR: Shut up!
DENNIS: Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! HELP! HELP! I’m being repressed!

Now the Lady of the Lake is a legit Arthurian legend. She’s generally considered to be a water nymph and was famous for more than just king making. She was said to have cured a young prepubescent Lancelot from a case of certain death and locked everyone’s favorite wizard, Merlin, in the base of a tree for something like a 100 years in order to pilfer his knowings and show how much she loved him. The stories go on and on, but for now I think we’ll just leave you with some brief bulleted descriptors and see what that gets us!

• She’s a woman that lives in a lake somewhere in the British Isles
• Some say beautiful and magical, some would argue that claim, but you know, eyes of beholder and all…
• Considered by many to be a water Nymph, others a fairy queen, still others, a very wet witch
• Famed for handing Arthur the sword Excalibur being lancelots adopted mom and going sorta “Misery” on Merlin
• Probably, very well versed at medieval water sports… if there were such a thing?
• Went by many names including Nimue and Elaine, but my favorite because of the Young Ones tie in, is Vivian

 
That’s it! All I ask is you don’t try too hard and have fun with it! We’ll close off submissions for judgement midnight of Friday the 10th… As always, We’ll gather the judges council and pick one to win a shirt, so get your asses doodling!

 


The Judges have convened and decision rendered! Here’s what everyone picked and their reasonings

Chip
So #5’s Flashdance sweatshirt with “Make America Lake Again” almost got me… But the more I look at #2, the more I notice the left to right gradient of delightful wonder… twisting to candle lit hell, filled with bird beaks and love gone sour… also seeing the dark cloud behind the wizard as fluffy chest hair and noticing how uncomfortable Merlin looks in that tree, helps a lot!

Ken
# 6 – it’s all about what you don’t see. I like to think that every time you go swimming in a lake, there’s someone down below trying to stab at you. Or maybe she’s just using the sword as an antennae while watching tv with Jason Voorhees on an underwater couch.

Sarah
#4 – First and foremost, I love the technique, great textures and colors. Secondly, I love a good grimace, and that pool-floaty grimace is top-notch.

Mona
#7…points for sword placement. Also, it would be a nice replacement for the February 2017 Frazetta calendar art, currently hanging in our kitchen, if there was just a little more bare bottom! Or …that Carl’s Junior ad women everywhere have been waiting for!

Cody
#7 – A moving thought piece exploring the intricacies and dangers of our assumptions regarding societal gender norms. The purposeful placement of the sword calls to mind patriarchal oppression and the damage it inflicts. Wait, is this supposed to be a chick?

So by my math that’s a win for #7! Congrats to Richie I’ll be in touch!

Disagree if you must but know that judgement is law and to the winner a shirt will go…. Thanks to drawers and judges alike. And even though the contest is done we’ll always welcome new Lady of the Lake drawings for the archives! So draw on and remember, 25 beasts drawn earns you a shirt!